5 Weeks 3 days

Still quite crampy but just accepting it as normal stretching! No sign of bleeding which is reassuring. Keeping the feet up as much as possible!

Nerves

This waiting for 7 week scan is a killer - nearly as bad as the 2ww.

2 nights ago I have a little brown spotting - freaked me out!! That is gone now.

The past two days I've been having light crampiness -not painful just dull - again freaking me out!

Did another internet cheapie this after noon - the test line is so much darker than the control. Just puts my mid at ease a tiny bit.

Resting up now - literally doing nothing!

Getting stronger!

4w 4days

Still can't quite believe it! The Cramps started easing on Tuesday now they are completely gone. I still can't get over how exactly they were like AF pains - same severe intensity.

My clinic doesn't do betas unless there is something to worry about. I'm booked in for 7 week scan in January - can't wait for that but I'll be nervous about it. Lines are continuing to get darker on my internet cheapie tests.

On Tuesday I'm gonna do another digi - I'm hoping it will show 3+

No symptoms at this point - feel totally normal. I keep waking up MAD early - more with excitement than anything else.

Will update on Tuesday.

Evening test

9dp5dt BFP

Got a BFP today - wtf?!?!??!?!

I was SURE it was all over. Really feel like AF is on way.

I can't get excited because of the cramps!!!!

I literally never had a bfp before....never!

8dp5dt

I haven't had a great few days. Cramps got a lot stronger throughout the week. I know in my heart it hasn't worked. I test 6dp5dt (sneaky test) - BFN (prob too early anyway).

On Thursday (7days) I went to clinic for Intralipids. The nurse there couldn't get a vein so I ended up having to come into clinic this morning to see doc. I was a wreck, very emotional. I told him I'm sure it hadn't worked as I've been having bad cramps and I asked him did he think I should even bother with the intralipids. He was great - really listened and didn't patronise me. He told me I prob was right that it didn't work as I know my own body. But he recommended getting the intralipds just in case I was wrong. He got the IV set up in seconds (painlessly).

He gave me cyclogest to take up to official test date. I've to switch from crinone. He said that if it didn't work, we'd throw everything at the next cycle. He was so positive, I actually felt better. I 99.9% for sure know that AF is on the way. I'll take the cyclogest anyway to cover all bases. He also said if it didn't work, I could get going on FET#2 asap. So basically prep in Jan and transfer early Feb. (I'll be 30 in Feb).

I'm determined now to have a great Christmas - I'm determined that this will be our last Christmas as a twosome. Either we'll have a "plus one" on our arms or on route next xmas.

Again I am not gonna wish away the weeks. I would really like to have a plan in place before the xmas break so to know that we have something to look forward to in the New Year.

5dp5dt

Cramps - Lwr back pain - Bloating - AF Symtpoms - Heart Palpitations

3dp5dt

Very Crampy - just took paracetamol.

Lower back pain.

I'm hating this 2ww :(

Dull Achiness

That's what I've been feeling all morning. Dunno if it's a good thing or bad thing...

Edited to add: It's really a crampy, heavy feeling. Why so early? Why at 2dp5dt?

Time will tell, I suppose.

Transfer

Well, I had the transfer done yesterday. All went well, two of the embryos survived the thaw and the transfer went very smoothly. I'm just taking it easy now - had a good night sleep last night and and chilling out on the couch. (Getting a bit bored though!)

It feels surreal - almost like it never happened.

Anyway my OTD is the 14th of Dec - so my plan is to hold out until then. Last time I tortured myself. I am also gonna stay away from the internet and I google EVERYTHING last time.

Fingers-crossed....